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Fifty Shades of Grey-Film Review

So the long-awaited film based on the erotic novel by British author E.L James, set readers’ tongues wagging again when it was first announced the motion picture derivative will hit cinema screens on Valentine’s Day in an orchestrated worldwide premiere. Even here in Namibia, expectations were running high to get a glimpse of what all the hype meant. Alas, the film proved to be a glorious disappointment, turning out just as trashy, or even worse, than the novel series.
The film tells the story of the deepening relationship between a college graduate, Anastasia Steele, (Dakota Johnson) and a young business magnate, Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). Christian is a grumpy, withdrawn, handsome man with a lot of issues. After being interviewed by Anastasia he decides he wants a sexual relationship with her. However the relationship is not like the typical “let’s meet for a shag” once in a while kind of relationship but involves elements like bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism (BDSM).

I will admit that before watching the film I was naïve and had never taken the time to read the book, even when it was doing the rounds and created a wave of gossip. Mostly, it taught young girls how to be naughty as they read what most mothers would consider an inappropriate form of literature. Discussion of the novel’s tits and tats were so pervasive, it was impossible not to take note of its contents.
I did try to read it when a friend sent it to me via email but for the love of me I just could not get myself drawn into continue reading the book. This is not because I am a snob or anything but because then and even now I still am not interested in reading the book. I found nothing in the small part I started to read that captured my imagination in the slightest.
When the film  premiered again the buzz was too much so I decided to throw caution to the wind and jump on the 50 Shades of Grey bandwagon and watched the film. Sigh! All I can say is that I am disappointed to say the least. How can something so highly anticipated be such a flop? Yes, I said a flop. Not even Dornan’s good looks did it for me. I actually found the relationship between the two rather awkward, painful and upsetting. Despite the storyline (we all know that sex sells) the actors’ acting skills fall flat and the leading actress’ timid character comes off as sexist stating that women should be submissive to men regardless of what they have to do to please them.
It is not really a story for incurable hopeless romantics like myself, it is more a sort of substitute entertainment and fantasy for sex starved or sexually frustrated women. One thing is for sure, I did feel 50 shades of something after watching this with feelings ranging from awkwardness to confusion. I bet the grey part of my poor brain is now 50 shades darker after being subjected to 50 shades of nothing but sheer, unmeasurable boredom.
Overall, I feel that the hype about the film is such an over-stretch. The desire to even be entertained by perversion is a problem all by itself but this is just my opinion. It is also a serious injustice to women. This is rubbish sold to us as a form of love. I was more livid than entertained or educated .
There is no story, no plot, no development and the characters, I feel, lack dismally. To those who have not watched the film or read the book, save your money, guard your precious minds and let that curiosity die, just let it die. Be 50 shades wiser and to you who want to fall onto the 50 shades bandwagon, go watch at your own risk! It is trash wrapped in a shiny red Valentine’s wrapper.

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